Thursday, June 27, 2013

Poop, poopy, poo poo, caca, doo doo, #2

Oh SH@&! POTTY TRAINING

It's everywhere, all of the time, non-stop. The fear that a poop is (gag) about to rear its' ugly head, is unnerving. 

At no point in my life did I imagine I would have to literally deal with so much excrement! A terd landed on my arm (plop) today as I was picking up B to rush him to the potty. Approximately one eighth of the poop made it into the toilet. I felt the urge to call 911 and alert the hazmat unit to handle the "trail" of poop that hit the floor and various surfaces on said rush to the potty. I have three dogs and pick their poo up every day outside without much ado. There is just something extra irking and gag inducing about human feces inside your home, on your skin, on the floor, partly on the vanity and a sprinkle on the shower curtain (that may not have been poop on the shower curtain, I had colored my hair the day before so it may have been a spot of Clairol, but by this point I wasn't taking any chances), it was everywhere it shouldn't be and I was feeling nauseous. 

I find myself saying things like "it's only pee", with genuine relief when I see a puddle, stain or feel wet on my arm. I have various pairs of "big boy" underwear for B to choose from, pull-ups for sleeping or any time we have to be without a potty for more than thirty minutes. We set our "potty alarm" for every thirty minutes. I do not offer anything more than hugs and praise when he goes. I tried treats with stickers and charts but he was hip to my shake quick and didn't seem motivated by it all. So, I set the "potty alarm" and I bring that froggy potty everywhere. I mean EVERYWHERE. In the car, on play dates, to the park, we are never more than a few yards from that potty. This has proven very successful for pee. The poo, is like a diamond treasure to him, he holds it until he either gets a pull-up on or (hold your breath) he's in the bathtub. He just doesn't want to let the poo go into the potty. 

I know eventually, one day he will simply start to go poo in the potty. He will do it on his own terms, not mine. I know he won't be an adult and need me running after him to go poo poo on the potty, it just feels like that today. 

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